Sunday, December 2, 2007

Taking Care of Mom

As a stay-home homeschooling mom of four children, I totally understand the need to get away for some 'mom time'. Getting time away from the children and the demands of keeping your home, taking care of everyone else, and even the duties of homeschooling just brings refreshment to those weary bones, or should I say those weary brain cells?

Before we became wives and mothers we were adult women. Have we so easily forgotten? We had hobbies and passions and interestes. When all the conversation you get is to short people under 4 feet tall who, for some crazy reason, are not interested in the same interesting things that you, as an adult woman, are interested in, it becomes, well... just a bit 'trapping' sometimes. I don't know about you, but I have sometimes felt like I was trapped inside a never-ending kiddie world of Blue's Clues and sticky jelly faces and thought that if I didn't get away I would go stark-raving mad!

Now, I have to be honest here. As important as I know it is, I don't get time away by myself very often at all. (I don't count those trips to Wal-Mart for groceries. What's refreshing about that?!) But that's only because of it simply not being very easy or convenient for me to do for one reason or another.

However, my mom had surgery on her shoulder Friday and Baby Girl and I went with her while Honey stayed home with the three little ones. We left at 6:30 in the morning and didn't arrive back at my mom's house until around 7:30 in the evening. Honey had taken the three littles to his mom's house while he went with his dad to watch our nephew's basketball game, and I couldn't leave my mom by herself to go get them. So when Honey and the kiddos got back home around 11 pm I literally RAN home to grab some jammies for me and Baby Girl and to SQUEEZE my babies just as tightly as I could because I had missed them so much. I hadn't seen them since the night before when I tucked them into bed and my arms ached for them! They all just squealed 'MOMMY!' as soon as I walked in the door and ran to hug me. It was the BEST feeling in the world. I loved on them a little bit, tucked them in bed, and went back to my mom's to spend the night with her (and Baby Girl).

The reason I'm sharing this is because it is SO important for us moms to find time to just be women. To enjoy those things we enjoy, even if it's just strolling through Barnes & Noble and grabbing a cuppocino! Anything that will refresh us, revive us, and give our overworked brains a time of renewal. It's not selfish to take time for yourself, it's wisdom. Wisdom ladies! Because I promise you, you will come back home refreshed and ready for those little arms to wrap around you and those sticky jelly faces to cover you in kisses and you will be a better mommy, and wife, because of it.

Think it's simply impossible to find time for yourself? I challenge you on that. Sometimes when something isn't exactly 'easy' we tend to say it's 'impossible'. Maybe you could work on getting up an hour or so earlier than the kids in the morning. There's nothing more peaceful that those early morning hours by yourself. Or, have a fairly-early SET bedtime for the kids (and stick to it!) in order to allow you a couple of quiet hours in the evening. I'm sure your Honey would be more than happy to work out a planned schedule with you so you could get a little time of refreshment each week. If that's not possible, how about a grandparent or a good friend or neighbor. Maybe you could swap babysitting duties with another mom who's also in need of some weekly mommy-time.

The important thing is to find a way to do it. I love my children with a crazy PASSION! I swear, they are so yummy I could just eat them up! However, I know that sometimes we ALL need a break from each other and by getting some mommy-time every now and then helps me to be a calmer, nicer, and more patient mommy (and wife).

Try it. I PROMISE you'll like it!


Letitia said...

I came over to your blog from Marsha's. This is a great post. I have learned to not feel guilty for enjoying time away from my girls. My favorite time is when dad takes them somewhere, and I have the house to myself.
The most interesting things~~as I scanned down some of your posts, I got to the one of the zoo. I did a double~take, and thought, "Hey! That's 'our' zoo." And sure enough, when I got to the picture of the Tortoise area, I could see the partial name back behind it. We live in Sevier County. Great to meet you.
Your kids are beautiful, by the way.

Letitia said...

It occured to me yesterday, that I didn't leave you my blog address. You can visit me at


Heather said...

OH I so couldn't agree more Christy! I have to have that time to myself or I turn into this ugly mommy/wife monster that no one likes to be around at all! ;) Your post was so wonderful and so important to remind ourselves of that and that we are not just moms but so much more and each part of us needs taken care of in different ways. TFS! :)